When a dog loses a companion, how does it cope with the loss? Nugget’s owner contacted me with that very concern. Since the recent death of their other dog, Rufus, Nugget seemed lost and depressed. Her owner wanted to know how she could help her through this difficult time.

What Nugget told me during our session was not what I expected.

If Nugget was feeling deeply lost and depressed, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to connect with her. But when I tuned in, she was immediately receptive. She even seemed eager to communicate, and her messages for her owners flowed easily.

Nugget told me she was worried about her owners. She was feeling their sadness and sense of loss following Rufus’s death, as well as her own. But there was something comforting: Rufus had been checking in with her regularly from the other side, so to Nugget, it hardly felt as though he was gone.

During our session, one feeling kept coming through: Nugget lacked self-confidence.

She told me she had always relied on Rufus. He was the dominant dog, while Nugget took the more submissive role. When Nugget needed to go outside to pee, Rufus was the one to bark to let their owners know the door needed to be opened. Then he would sit and watch while Nugget did her business.

There was something else Nugget wanted me to understand. Deep down, she believed Rufus had always been the family’s favorite. Now, the sadness she sensed in her family since his passing seemed to confirm that belief.

Life without Rufus was a big change for Nugget, but she told me she was ready to take care of herself and her family. She was willing to step into the role Rufus had played in their lives. She could become the main dog in the household and develop the confidence she needed to handle that responsibility.

But she needed her owners to give her a chance.

Nugget asked them to be especially expressive in showing how much they wanted her around: to invite her to sit beside them, let her know they enjoyed her company, and stop comparing her to Rufus. These gestures, she said, would help her feel wanted and valued, building the self-confidence she needed to embrace her new role.

She had one more request: she didn’t want her owners to rush out and get another dog. She wanted the opportunity to discover who she could be without Rufus and to experience being the family’s one and only dog for a while.

Nugget’s story reminds us that when a beloved animal dies, the whole family must find its way through the loss. The surviving animals may need reassurance, attention, and the chance to discover who they are without their companion.